Do we, as employees, spend 100% of our time on work related “stuff” while at work? Of course not. That doesn’t mean you should make that fact obvious by complaining when your computer’s default games get removed.
Sure the fiasco in the new story started when some new computers came with the games already uninstalled while existing work computers still had them… thus raising the issue of fairness at the workplace. But who was the first brilliant employee who decided to actually raise that issue? I mean what do you say to your boss. “Um… excuse me, but my new computer doesn’t have minesweeper or solitaire on it when other people’s computers do have it. I’d really like those programs installed please.” If that doesn’t stamp you as a slacker at work, I don’t know what does!
File that under hardcore hearts player.
Tags: work computers, windows games
I haven’t shamelessly plugged another site of mine in quite some time, so I figure I’m due. As such, let me introduce to you Book Clubs Online, a website where bookworms everywhere can find and join existing book clubs or simply create their own. Book clubs feature forums, chat, calendar events, and much more. Oh yeah, it’s also 100% free.
Sure this may just be me advertising one of my new sites, and it may not have much to do with office humor, but you can go ahead and ignore that little hiccup right? Ok, so you could create an office humor book club, complete with office joke books, and pranking how-to books. There. This post is now 100% relevant!
It’s almost that time of year again as April Fool’s day quickly approaches. If you’re looking to pull off an awesome office prank for April Fool’s, you may want to check out my list of 5 important office prank tips for the coming pranking holiday.
- People know it’s April Fool’s Day
Let’s face it, most people are going to be overly cautious during April Fool’s Day – making your job that much more difficult. You can use this to your advantage though. Pulling off your pranks a day or two before or after April 1st may be enough to catch some people off guard. For those potential victims who are extra tough to prank, why not do a small, simple prank on the 1st (such as Bugged or Creamed) and then follow it up with a much bigger prank the next day or two (like Packed In). They may think your initial prank was the whole kit-and-kaboodle, thus letting their guard down for the real prank.
- Get as many people in on your pranks as possible
The great thing about pranking coworkers is that you’ve got a large supply of helpers and witnesses to enjoy the outcome with. Bring in as many coworkers as possible to help you out to make it a group effort and you will all enjoy it that much more (not to mention have that many more people to laugh at your victim).
- Take pictures or video
You don’t want your prank to be forgotten any time soon, so be sure to take pictures and video if at all possible. This means recording the preparation as well as the outcome. Once the prank is over, you can probably find some good use for your photos by placing them on bulletin boards in the break room, on your desktop wallpaper, and maybe even put them on your company website for an office morale boost.
- Remember that you are still an employee!
Probably the most imporant tip that I can give is to remind you that you are still an employee of a company and that whatever prank (or pranks) you decide to pull off must be done so delicately. Make sure your pranks don’t overly hurt anybody’s feelings or do much property damage. The best thing you can do is to get approval by a higher up before doing anything. If you do your pranks in good fun and choose victims with a great sense of humor, you can limit your risk for repercussions.
Tags: office pranks, april fool’s day, prank tips, pranking coworkers
If you’re looking for a job, one thing you need to be aware of is that many employers search the Web for dirt on job applicants. That means you better make sure your Facebook, MySpace, and other social networking profiles don’t contain that half naked, drunk party pic from your last New Year’s party. Of course, you may be in luck if a new movement by some children’s groups have their way as they try and ban employers from being able to search for information about their job applicants online.
I’m going to go ahead and go out on a limb and assume this movement won’t do anything. While I admit they do make some good points (making the comparison of reading a person’s diary to reading their online profiles), the big point they gloss over is that you voluntarily put your information online and should know that it could definitely be used against you. Sure, it sucks if you weren’t the one to post those not-so-pleasant pictures of you with your pants around your ankles, but I have no sympathy for those who create their own profiles and then get upset when a potential employer finds out.
File that under just say no to MySpace.
Tags: social networking profiles, job applicants, Facebook, MySpace
A man went into the office kitchen one morning and found a beautiful blond woman painting the walls. She was wearing a fur coat and a nice denim jacket.
Thinking this was a bit strange, he asked her why she was wearing such nice clothes rather than overalls.
The blonde simply sighed and showed him the instructions on the tin, “For best results, put on two coats.”
Tags: blond joke, painting joke
Companies always seem to be trying to find ways to cut costs (no free coffee, no more free donut fridays, etc), but telling your employees to use urine bags instead of public restrooms seems to be a bit extreme. Ok, so urine bags would probably be better than a lot of public restrooms, but there’s something about peeing in a bag that just doesn’t sit right with me.
The story does mention that the company is claiming that the bags are provided for convenience and that it’s not a company policy to force people to use the bags. Even still, it seems like it may be one of those things where it’s an unspoken rule and if you’re the one guy not trapping your excess liquid in a bag, you may quickly find yourself out of a job.
File that under I prefer a nearby bush to a plastic bag.
Tags: urine bags, public restrooms
You think your work week is tough? Tell that to poor Jose, a new Wal-Mart employee.
Tags: wal-mart employee, funny work video
A guy dials his home phone number and a strange woman answers. The guy says, “Who is this?”
“This is the maid,” answers the woman.
“We don’t have a maid,” says the man.
The woman says, “I was hired this morning by the lady of the house.”
The man says, “Well, this is her husband. Is she there?”
The woman replies, “She is upstairs in the bed room with someone who I figured was her husband.”
The guy is fuming and says to the maid, “Listen, would you like to make $50,000?”
The maid says, “What will I have to do?”
The man tells her, “I want you to get my gun from the desk, and shoot the witch and the jerk she’s with.”
The maid puts the phone down and the man hears footsteps and then two gun shots. The maid comes back to the phone, “What do I do with the bodies?”
The man says, “Throw them in the swimming pool.”
Puzzled, the maid answers, “But you don’t have a pool.”
The man pauses for a moment and says, “Ummmm… Is this 555-3248?”
Tags: maid joke
An elderly couple named Sam and Helen are vacationing in the West. Sam always wanted a pair of authentic cowboy boots and seeing some on sale one day, he buys them, wears them back to the hotel, walking proudly. He walks into their hotel room and says to his wife, “Notice anything different, Helen?”
Helen looks him over, “Nope.”
Sam says excitedly, “Come on, Helen, take a good look. Notice anything different about me?”
Helen looks again and again says, “Nope.”
Frustrated, Sam storms off into the bathroom, undresses and walks back into the room completely naked except for his boots. Again, he asks, a little louder this time, “Notice anything DIFFERENT?”
Helen looks up and says, “Sam, what’s different? It’s hanging down today, it was hanging down yesterday and it’ll be hanging down again tomorrow.”
Furious, Sam yells, “AND DO YOU KNOW WHY IT’S HANGING DOWN, HELEN? IT’S HANGING DOWN BECAUSE IT’S LOOKING AT MY NEW BOOTS!”
To which Helen replies, “Shoulda bought a hat, Sam, shoulda bought a hat.”
Tags: senior joke, cowboy boots
I’m not sure if the following video dealing with a nervous breakdown in an office elevator is real or not – my guess is that it isn’t – though I could definitely see it happening.
Tags: office elevator, nervous breakdown
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