Ask the hostage taker if he/she would like to go to dinner after the stand-off.

When hearing the demands suddenly yell into the phone, "It all you you you! What about my needs?!"

When you call the hostage taker, tell him you'd like a large thick crust pepperoni and snicker loudly.

Show up stoned and do anything at all.

When the hostage taker lists his demands yell into the phone "La la la la! I can't hear you!"

Mention how much income tax the hostage taker will have to pay if he/she gets the F-15 he/she wants.

Tell the hostage take that you think Rosanne Barr should play him in the TV movie of the stand-off.

Tell the hostage taker you think it'd be really cool if a hostage came flying out of a 52nd story window.

Tell the hostage taker that he must convert to hindu if he wants you to deal with him.

When the hostage taker agrees to let the hostages go tell him, "You're never gonna be on COPS with a wimp attitude like that."

[tags]hostage negotiator mistakes, hostage humor[/tags]