I’ve added a new design to the Office Gear section of the SIAB GEAR store – Disgruntled. The design is featured on all the popular products, shirts, hats, mugs – even the teddy bear.
The grey used in the design looks incredibly good on the white background products as well as on the darkest colored shirts. Some of the lighter colored shirts (light red, light blue, etc) don’t look nearly as sharp in my opinion. But, like I said, that’s just my opinion so make sure head on over to the store and decide for yourself.
A staff member at a high school was fired after she was caught stealing toilet paper. The 44 year old woman has admitted to stealing the TP, but says she doesn’t know why she did it.
I can neither confirm, nor deny, the fact that I may have used illegally obtained toilet paper in college. School toilet paper is little better than wiping your arse with newspaper.
File that under when you gotta go, you gotta go.
Tags: school toilet paper, TP
- Tell a man that there are 400 billion stars and he’ll believe you.
- Tell him a bench has wet paint and he has to touch it.
- How come Superman could stop bullets with his chest, but always ducked when someone threw a gun at him?
- Why is it fake lemon juice contains mostly artificial ingredients, but dishwashing liquid contains real lemons?
- Why do we wait until a pig is dead to ‘cure’ it?
- Why do we wash bath towels? Aren’t we clean when we use them?
- Why do we put suits in a garment bag and put garments in a suitcase?
- Why doesn’t glue stick to the inside of the bottle?
- Do Roman paramedics refer to IVs its ‘4s’?
- What do little birdies see when they get knocked unconscious?
- Why doesn’t Tarzan have a beard?
- If man evolved from monkeys and apes, why do we still have monkeys and apes?
- Should you trust a stockbroker who’s married to a travel agent?
- Is boneless chicken considered to be an invertebrate?
- Do married people live longer than single people do, or does it just SEEM longer?
- I went to a book store and asked the saleswoman, ‘Where’s the self-help section?’ She said if she told me it would defeat the purpose.
- If all those psychics know the winning lottery numbers, why are they all still working?
- Isn’t the best way to save face to keep the lower part shut?
Tags: jokes, humor
A new study released shows that being stressed at work can help make you obese.
I could have sworn that it’s already been shown that stress, in general, can cause obesity. So what exactly does the new study prove? I dunno, but the next time you start getting stressed at work, tell your boss that your sick of your job making you fat.
File that under could be the donuts.
Tags: work stress, stress and obesity
- Isn’t Disney World a people-trap operated by a mouse?
- Whose cruel idea was it for the word “lisp to have an ’s’ in it?
- How come ‘abbreviated’ is such a long word?
- If it’s zero degrees outside today and it’s supposed to be twice as cold tomorrow, how cold is it going to be?
- Why do you press harder on a remote control when you know the battery is dead?
- Why are they called buildings when they’re already finished? Shouldn’t they be called builts?
- Why are they called apartments when they’re all stuck together?
- Why do banks charge you a ‘non-sufficient funds’ fee on money they already know that you don’t have?
- If the universe is everything, and scientists say that the universe is expanding, what is it expanding into?
- What would a chair look like if your knees bent the other way?
- If a tree falls in the forest and no one is around to see it, do the other trees make fun of it?
- Why is a carrot more orange than an orange?
- When two aeroplanes almost collide, why do they call it a near miss? It sounds like a near hit to me!
- Do fish get cramps after eating?
- Why are there five syllables in the word ‘monosyllabic’?
- Why do scientists call it ‘research’ when they are looking for something new?
- If vegetarians eat vegetables, what do humanitarians eat?
- When I erase a word with a pencil, where does it go?
- Why is it that when a door is open, it’s ajar, but when a jar is open, it’s not a door?
Tags: jokes, humor
You often hear about people getting upset about their employer’s not letting them take full breaks, but a person suing because they are not allowed to work during lunch? That’s 10 kinds of crazy right there.
The person is actually claiming that their arthritis disability requires them to stay active and that being required to take a lunch break is a violation of the Americans with Disabilities Act. Um… it’s not like they are forcing him to not keep himself busy during lunch – just that he can’t work. Maybe he has a better claim under the American’s with Mental Disabilities Act?
File that under maybe he’s afraid of brown bags.
Tags: Americans with Disabilities Act, lunch breaks
- Last night I played a blank tape at full blast. The mime next door went nuts.
- If a person with multiple personalities threatens suicide, is that considered a hostage situation?
- Just think how much deeper the ocean would be if sponges didn’t live there.
- I went for a walk last night and my kids asked me how long I’d be gone. I said, ‘The whole time.’
- So what’s the speed of dark?
- After eating, do amphibians need to wait an hour before getting OUT of the water?
- Why don’t they just make mouse-flavored cat food?
- If you’re sending someone some Styrofoam, what do you pack it in?
- I just got skylights put in my place. The people who live above me are furious.
- Why do they sterilize needles for lethal injections?
- Do they have reserved parking for non-handicapped people at the Special Olympics?
- Is it true that cannibals don’t eat clowns because they taste funny?
- If it’s tourist season, why can’t we shoot them?
Tags: joke, humor
Want to really be cruel? How about getting your vict… I mean coworker to think that their job is on the market?
Requirements:
- Time (low) – all you’re going to need to do is write a job ad – shouldn’t take you much time.
- Cost (low) – you can go the cheap route and put the job ad up on all free sites or you could pay some money and put it up on a big job site.
- Risk (low) – there’s really not a big risk for you except for maybe falsely advertising a job that doesn’t exist (which is cruel for the people that’ll call as you are wasting their time).
Steps:
- Fill out an ad for the job your coworker does. Put their phone number and email as the contact info and make sure to put in some interesting job requirements.
- Put the ad up on your favorite job listing sites. Some cost money (CareerBuilder.com, Monster.com), others are cheap or free(CraigsList).
Result:
Depending on what you put on your ad, you’ll get different results. If you went the obvious and easy route, like putting down a high amount of pay with low requirements, your victim should get a lot of phone calls and emails, which will either scare him a bit that his job might actually be open, or just give him a good laugh as he realizes what you did.
However, you could also go a more creative route by putting down some interesting requirements. Perhaps the applicants all must speak a certain language that isn’t English, or must all send in essays on why most people (like your victim) don’t do their job well. You could really have some fun with it, but do keep in mind that you are going ot be wasting the time of some actuall job applicants, so only do so if you’re truly cruel and have no heart 
Tags: office prank, keyboard prank, April Fool’s prank
The secretary walked into her boss’ office and announced, “I’m afraid I have bad news for you.”
“Kelly”, said the boss, “Why do you always bring me bad news? Try to be more positive.”
“Ok”, she said. “The good news is you’re not sterile.”
Tags: office joke, work joke
Sara Taylor used to be a bus driver, that is, until she was fired for putting duct tape over a 6 year old’s mouth.
While duct taping a child is definitely funny (and hell, I’m sure we’ve all wanted to do it at one time or another), I think the best part of the story is that the child’s mother chose to not over react and press charges or sue. It’s nice to see a parent not go completely berzerk over such a small incident. Of course, the bus driver did still get fired, but duct taping a 6 year old does come at a price.
File that under duct tape use number 32441.
Tags: duct tape uses, bus driver fired
Loading ...
