Why God Never Received Tenure at the University:

• Because he had only one major publication.


• And it was in Hebrew.


• And it had no cited references.


• And it wasn't published in a refereed journal or even submitted for peer review.


• And some even doubt he wrote it himself.


• It may be true that he created the world but what has he done since?


• His cooperative efforts have been quite limited.


• The scientific community has had a very rough time trying to replicate his results.


• He never applied to the Ethics Board for permission to use human subjects.


• When one experiment went awry, he tried to cover it up by drowning the subjects.


• He rarely came to class, just told students to read the book.


• He expelled his first two students for learning.


• Although there were only ten requirements, most students failed his tests.


• His office hours were infrequent and usually held on a mountain top.


• When subjects didn't behave as predicted, he often punished them, or just deleted them from the sample.