Oct 31, 2006

Funny Cubicle Horror Video

Remember that movie where the woman keeps getting threatening phone calls and the police eventually trace them back to coming from inside the same house as her? Well the following video takes that premise and throws it all into a cubicle.

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Oct 31, 2006

Joke 278: 10 Halloween Phrases That Sound Dirty

10. She’s a goblin!
9. I’d like to get a little something in the sack.
8. Let me see your bag…. Oh! You’re having a great night!
7. Just get on your hands and knees, and bob your head.
6. She’s got a couple of nice pumpkins on her porch.
5. If you just lick it, it’ll last longer.
4. Show me your Jujubes and I’ll let you see my Zagnuts.
3. Have your mom check it before you put it in your mouth…
2. You scared me stiff!
1. He’s got Candy spread out on the living room floor!

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Oct 30, 2006

10 Dirtiest Jobs in Science

You think your job is bad? Check out this list of the 10 dirtiest jobs in science and think again.

Some of the worst include orangutan-pee collector, carcass cleaner, semen washer, and manure inspector. When I saw manure inspector listed, it reminded me of the part in Jurassic Park where they sifted through tricerotops manure - not to mention the puss blisters.

I know some jobs can get dirty, but the ones on the above list are just plain rediculous. I sure hope they get paid well for their efforts.

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Oct 30, 2006

Shopkeeper Forklifts Parked Car

Careful where you park or you may find your car raised by a forklift. The shopkeeper in the story also punched the car, then the car’s owner.

The shopkeeper complained that the car was blocking access to a storage container, even though the car was parked legally. Stranger still, the shopkeeper raised the car but left it in the parking spot.

File that under yeah… just slightly unstable.

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Oct 30, 2006

Joke 277: Workplaces and Septic Tanks

Workplaces are like septic tanks:

All the biggest lumps eventually rise to the top.

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Oct 27, 2006

No More Tighty Whiteys For Canadian Town’s Firefighters

A town in British Columbia, Canada is so troubled by firefighter sexual harassment that it will soon be requiring all firefighters to wear boxers only. In fact, they are planning on spending over $14,000 to buy six pears of underwear for each firefighter.

They are claiming that it’s to help prevent sexual harassment and to help the firestations become more “gender neutral”. I don’t know about you, but if I needed saving by a firefighter, I’d want him as comfortable as he (or she) could be. If my firefighter likes tighty whiteys, then let my firefighter wear tighty whiteys.

File that under proud tighty whitey wearer since 1980.

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Oct 27, 2006

Joke 276: 10 Reasons Why Trick or Treating is Better Than Sex

10) You are guaranteed to get at least a little something in the sack.
9) If you get tired, you can wait 10 minutes and go at it again.
8) The uglier you look, the easier it is to get some.
7) You don’t have to compliment the person who gives you some.
6) It’s O.K. when the person you’re with fantasizes you’re someone else, because you are.
5) Forty years from now you’ll still enjoy candy.
4) If you don’t like what you get, you can always go next door.
3) It doesn’t matter if the kids hear you moaning and groaning.
2) Less guilt the morning after.
1) YOU CAN DO THE WHOLE NEIGHBORHOOD.

Oct 26, 2006

Intense Computer Kid Video

Ever get frustrated with your computer? Know somebody in the office that tends to throw fits when something doesn’t go right? Well, I’m guessing you’ve never experienced anybody quite as intense as the kid in the following movie. It’s probably a setup and not real, though it definitely does look genuine.

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Oct 26, 2006

Joke 275: The Devil

A woman whose husband often came home drunk decided to cure him of the habit. One Halloween night, she put on a devil suit and hid behind a tree to intercept him on the way home.

When her husband came by, she jumped out and stood before him with her red horns, long tail, and pitchfork.

“Who are you?” he asked.

“I’m the Devil,” she responded.

“Well, come on home with me,” he said, “I married your sister.”

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Oct 25, 2006

Carve Your Own Pumpkin Online

Jack-O-Lantern

With Halloween nearly here, you may want to try out your jack-o-lantern designs with this online flash pumpkin carving tool first. It’s very easy to use and can actually produce some pretty neat pumpkins.

The image in the upper left corner is the result of me messing around with the program for like five minutes (it’s supposed to be a pirate if you couldn’t tell). Once you’ve carved up the pumpkin how you want it, you can then click a button to simulate a candle burning inside it. It’s not overly complex, but it’s pretty cool nonetheless.

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